Life in Velvet
by NanaoSama
Summary: Delice is a soldier of Garrison, although her allegiance lies with the Survey Crops. However, she was never allowed to join them due to her closer relationship with Erwin. Can it be changed or will she need to live with the choice of love over duty?
1. Welcome Home

The rush on the street hinted their return. I could not help but hold my breathe, a scream of joy and dismay both trapped in my throat. From afar I already saw the numbers of survivors being significantly lesser than the amount of soldiers that left our retreat behind the walls and this sent my heart pounding as if it was to jump out of my chest.

Despite a small frame and fragile, pointy shoulders, I've managed to push through the crowd. I needed to know what made it back, I had to see with my own eyes that _he_ has returned.

"Look at those lunatics! How many casualties have they got this time?"

A man next to me sneered and was soon followed by the mob who, instead of cheering the heroes, badmouthed them to hell and back. The bitterness of this unfairness would have hit me had the mad anxiety not possessed me first. In my head the worst scenarios kept replacing one another, filling the hazel eyes of mine with premature tears. I wiped them off at once, firmly decided to only weep when the time came. How much I hoped it wouldn't!

As the Survey Corps entered the main street, insults and complains echoing left and right, I hectically scanned faces of the soldiers to find the one I longed to see.

"Please, please, please be alright."

I clasped my hands together as if for a prayer and pressed them close to my chest, muttering the same chant as if kind of a prayer. The man to shout out couple minutes ago then acknowledged my presence, noting the small ritual I performed.

"Huh? What do we have here?"

He leaned down to stare me in the eye and I nearly retched at the stench of booze coming from him. The snarl on his face did not encourage me either – he would not be so insolent had I been wearing military uniform I put to rest on my days off such as that one was.

"One of those bastards got himself a fine wench, I see."

The man roared with drunken laughter, and now it was my turn to have a say. I might have been a mere member of Garrison, but no less brave than any of the Survey Corps. Petite, blonde-haired girl with fierce hazel eyes and well defined cheekbones, I've never seemed to pose much of a danger. Anyone with chubby cheeks, tiny nose and round feminine assets would barely ever be taken seriously, I grew accustomed to that. Had it been my choice, I'd be behind the walls with him instead of worrying myself to half death in this fake haven of security, yet he was the one to prevent me from joining the Corps, leaving Garrison to be my best choice.

"The only bastard here is you. A cowardly, useless bastard that can do nothing but disrespect those who risk lives for a brighter future while hiding behind the walls."

It was enough to wipe the sneer off his face, although it started gaining a dangerous shade of burgundy, as if the man was to explode.

"How dare you, you little slut! I bet your brave soldier became a titan snack a while ago, and if that's the case I will rape that tight cunt of yours bloody while you're covered in snot over your hero! Then you will learn who is the real man!"

He raised his fist to support his words, but it never fell to land on me. The man's wrist got trapped in a firm grip and a stern gaze clearly made him lose tension in the muscles. I could not help it but feel the widest of smiles to creep on my face. There was no need to weep for my hero, for he was right here.

"It is poor manners to raise fist against a lady." He simply stated, staring the man right in the eyes.

"Let go!" He squirmed, clearly panicking over such confrontation, and he fulfilled the drunktard's request. With what resembled a pig squeal, he rushed away from the scene of his embarrassment, looking over his shoulder as he bumped into bystanders, almost as if he was scared of being followed.

My hero, on the other hand, had not such intent. He instead turned his attention to me.

"Delice, are you hurt?"

I shook my head, unable to muster a word as I gazed at him in awe. Not only was I relieved to have him back – I was astonished by his beauty, by his glory, by his strength. As if reading my mind, he scooped me up like a child, pressing me close to his body. Caught by surprise, I've yelped gently upon feeling my feet leaving the solid ground, but almost immediately wrapped arms around his neck.

The world around us vanished at that moment. I no longer heard the mean snarks of the crowd, I saw no injured men, I heard no weeps of mothers and wives of those who perished. All that mattered were us. In his strong, protective arms I did not care for anything else. With a wide, beaming smile conquering my face, I've landed the softest of kisses on his forehead.

"Welcome home, Erwin."


	2. When The Lights Are Down

Dusk was slowly spreading across the house as the final beams of dying sun would still occasionally penetrate the window. The shadows of the night were beginning their haunt, but their presence inflicted no fear. They were a valuable asset that created the coziness of the house, along with the swirling smoke of the pots blooming with the most pleasant aromas.

I lit the oil lamps once darkness started interfering with my vision and opened the cupboard where the precious glasses of porcelain were kept. A bottle of fine vintage wine already rested atop of a table with fresh white linen and silver table ware – all ready for a dinner. I grinned as I place glasses on the sides of each plate, filled with anticipation of the evening.

As it would be expected, the military commander would receive more funding from the government than a regular soldier, which allowed the stoic Erwin Smith to live a life far more luxurious than he would of cared of. I myself ranked high in Garrison and could not be seen as poor, thus every touch of mine I've put to this house were paid by my own sweat. It's been three years since Erwin suggested I keep him company in this big, lonely residence, and I merrily accepted it, putting every effort into turning an unwelcoming mansion into home.

The door opened and the hero I greeted earlier that day walked in. He was ever so handsome in the uniform, but the snow white shirt with black pants of fine fabric did him justice. Looking at him one could never say that's the man who reeked of sweat and death hours ago, but even that scent of his would make me dizzy. As for now though, he smelled of freshness and pine trees.

With a soft smile playing on his lips, Erwin walked to me and placed a gentle kiss atop of my lips.

"You look gorgeous tonight, Delice."

His words stroke my ego as if it was a fat cat, and the cat has begun purring. I was pleased with my looks that night as well. My hair was falling freely on my shoulders, a subtle red lipstick gave my face some definition. But it's my dress that stole the show – a beautiful velvet of dark purple glided along each and every curve of my body, then pooling at my feet, complimented by big silver necklace Erwin had gifted me on my birthday.

"Why thank you, handsome. Now, let's celebrate your return."

I got my toes to return him courtesy of a kiss, and the man I loved with my entire essence obediently followed my urge. He pulled the chair out for me, and I merrily accepted his gesture.

After Erwin was also seated, the butler made an appearance. Without a word, he opened the bottle and filled our glasses with the finest red I could get my hands on, taking his leave right after. As the door closed, I raised my glass.

"To your safe return."

"To our freedom."

Erwin replied to a toast and I nodded for he was right. It was selfish of me to celebrate his return only, especially when other soldiers have fallen. I wondered how many women were suffocating in their lonely houses now, torn by understanding their beloved ones will never return. It sent a chill down my spine and I prayed to never experience that. To wash my bitter thoughts off, I took a generous sip and an astonishing flavor has bloomed in my mouth at once.

Not long after food came, too. A thick soup of barley and venison. Salads of sweetgrass and spinach and plums, sprinkled with crushed nuts, rack of lamb baked in a crust of garlic and herbs, garnished with sprigs of mint, and surrounded by mashed yellow turnips swimming in butter. Out of it all the meat was the most expensive and difficult to get, but I took care of it in advance. It would have been a shame had the outcome of the expedition been tragic, but there was no place for such thoughts.

We feasted long and well, and by the time we were done the darkness has fully enveloped the world. My hand rested underneath Erwin's at the middle of the table, right next to the empty bottle of wine. The chatter of ours has died out and I was starting to feel tired, plus the wine made my mind a little cloudy. All that now lingered in the air was flickering of the lamp, we simply stared at each other in silence.

Erwin then raised to his feet, offering me a hand and I understood this mute gesture as a suggestion we call it a night. I nodded with an agreement, wondering how late was it. What felt like an hour was probably a couple, and rest was something we both needed.

As the bedroom door close, I turned my back to Erwin without saying a word, but it was not needed. Goosebumps pimpled my skin as his fingers touch the back of my neck, carefully undoing the necklace and handling it to me. As I've placed my prized accessory on the side table, he was already working on the zip of the dress. Upon me straightening, his lips found my flesh and proceeded on planting small kisses first on my neck, then back. In a bit over a minute the dress of mine laid on the floor and I stood in front of him barely covered.

I turned around, allowing him to see the glory of the lingerie I wore just for him. It wasn't much, just a little less modest than usual underclothes would be, with some lace on the sides, but it was enough to impress him.

With a tremble in his hands, Erwin embraced me before his lips found mine, feverishly seeking them to part. I could feel his excitement pressed against me, that alone making me gasp into his mouth, now vigorously invading mine.

Feeling about as impatient, I allowed my hands to act on their own as they've begun hastily undoing buttons on his shirt, and once he felt them loosening, Erwin wriggled out of it. I gazed down of a little, just to admire his well toned, firm body, but it was soon interrupted by him forcing me on the feather soft bed.

I giggled mischievously and ran fingers through his blonde locks as he buried face between my breasts, arching back into his touch to show just how much I craved him. Erwin reached underneath me to unclasp my bra, pulling it off and revealing my bare breasts with one swift move.

With a right hand, she squeezed one of my breasts. As his lips embraced my nipple, I could no longer suppress a moan. He took it as a sign, and while his tongue toyed with my upper part, the left hand wandered down where I needed him the most.

My legs twitched with anticipation as his fingers found the sweet spot, immediately applying some pressure to it while making slow, teasing circles. I couldn't help but shiver, closing my eyes with in the bliss of a moment. Those firm arms of his always knew how to touch me gently, and that was kind of magic I was helpless to.

I gasped at the loss when his lips left my nipple, but soon they were pressed to my flat stomach. I felt wetness of his tongue coming in contact with my skin and it then started tracing down. At his point my body already trembled with desire, the moistness between my tights being unbearable. His fingers left their job and instead tugged on the edge of the lacy garb covering my full glory, processing to pull them off completely.

Although not a stranger of love making, everytime I appeared fully naked for him I would blush like a virgin. There was no time to be embarrassed this time, though. Within a second his mouth was tightly pressed to the area previously covered and I was not given a luxury of catching my breathe.

His tongue was relentless, he trashed between my thighs and lapped like a dog, sending me crying out in pleasure. As if it was not enough for me to lose my mind, his fingers slid into me, enchanting the experience to the maximum. It did not take long till I climaxed, but even then I was not allowed to relax.

Erwin casually wiped mouth with the back of his hand before gripping onto my shoulder. I released a small yelp as the strength of his forced me on my stomach. His hand then landed on my head, pushing it into silks, but I would not complain. I've heard how his free hand worked undoing his pants and soon enough an audible smack landed on my bottom check. I whimpered, but got the hint, obediently putting my rear up in the air.

And then he entered me. From the very start he was merciless, the pounds being as fast as they were powerful. Another slap landed on my butt, sending me crying out once more. In a reply to that, his hand that kept my head pinned, gripped onto my hair instead. A firm tug made me raise of the bed, all the while his body carried on slamming into mine.

The Erwin I knew in bedroom was different from Erwin I knew in every day life. He was wild, consumed by primeval instincts, beast like, so different from his stoic and collected self. And I loved it. The hand that forced me into semi-erect position has once again gripped on my breast, his fingers digging deep into my flesh. My body shook with submission as he took me as roughly as he pleased.

He never said a word, he never would, the room was filled with nothing but my moans, his pants and sound of wet bodies slamming against one another. Before long, Erwin released the final, lengthy groan and I felt hotness filling me and streaming down my thigh right after he pulled out.

Both of us fell right on the bed, exhausted and with uneven breathe. I snuggled into him, sweaty from the intercourse and listened to his heart thumping while my own tried to return to its normal rate. The normal Erwin was back now, I could feel it, and I smiled when he embraced me.

"I'm glad you're back."

I whispered, earning myself a kiss on the head.

"I'm glad to be back."


	3. Strange And Ironic

[AN: Thanks to my friend SleepingAyumu deviantART who allowed me to borrow her OC Claudia! If you're on dA, please pay her a visit ;v;]

"You look tired, busy night, eh?"

The wink Hannes provided as a follow-up of his words sent a heatwave to my face and I huffed, taking a sharp turn to slap his face with my hair. It was partly meant to hide my bright red blush, but the sharp eyes of his had long registered it. With my back I could feel a giant cheeky smile spreading over his face and once I took my seat behind the desk it was indeed there.

"There's no shame in that we are all adults here. I'm often very tired myself, Claudia knows how to tire me out...That woman is one hell in bed, especially when she-"

"Enough. Please, I don't want to know more."

I groaned, covering my face with both hands. Adults or not, I'd prefer my private life staying private and not becoming a source of gossips. The woman in me hinted Claudia wouldn't be too comfortable knowing her husband went around talking of their sexual life either.

"Fine, fine."

He laughed, waving his hand as if he was to wave the topic off. If it wasn't so early in the morning I would have assumed he was drunk. Yet, there was truth in his words too. I had little sleep night before for the very reason he named, and the ache on my rear and between my thighs was quite bad. My professionalism, however, did not hint that anyhow.

Hannes then put a pile of reports on my desk and I nodded. Although part of Garrison division, I barely did any patrolling or was part of serious actions. My responsibilities were more behind the scenes, dealing with the paper work and providing results, achievements, insights and problems to the top officers. It was an important job and I found pleasure in it, yet it was fairly boring, especially taking into consideration the freedom and excitement Survey Corps dealt with. Yet, it was a job and it was a well paid one. I tried not to complain and did my best, but at times I couldn't shake off a feeling it was Erwin's doing this secure position of an office rat was given to no one but me.

"How's Claudia doing anyways?"

I asked at last. The two were an odd couple, with quite few vivid differences including age, but I was fond of them. Claudia did scare me at times with her harshness, but she was not a bad person overall. The reason I asked is because she, unlike me, was not a slightest bit happy to be in a position that offered any risk. On one hand I understood her – she was a mother to a child still young. On the other, however, I couldn't help but judge it. When my lover would risk his life and lives of his comrades, she would stay behind the wall, hoping and praying no threat ever comes her way.

"Ah… She's good...I guess."

He reached back to scratch his head and I sighed. It was no secret to me Claudia was move than hesitant to be back in military at all, and only fear of being sent to the so called re-claim of Wall Maria drove Hannes into pushing her towards it. A seasoned warrior she might have been, but lack of interest nor passion stripped her off any credit, leaving Claudia just average.

"That's good. She barely appeared in any of the last month's reports, thus I thought it wouldn't hurt to check."

Of course, she hasn't. Mrs Hannes, unlike her husband, barely put any effort into work. I've heard back in a day she was over the moon to join military and had some outstanding passion, but the days were gone since the fall of Shingashina. I couldn't blame her, not without ever seeing a titan myself.

"How's Erwin? Was the expedition successful?"

Unpleasant silence filled the room at once. It wasn't a good question to ask, not when both of us already knew the answer. Whenever Survey Corps went behind the walls they'd never bring good news, only casualties and grief. The crowd would always boo them, disregard the fallen soldiers, belittle their mission. It pained me, and I know it pained Erwin even more.

Despite that indifferent oh-so-royal face he pulled, despite the stoic stance and complete lack of reaction to complains, I, out of all people, knew how deep the words cut him. There were days he could barely cope with it – then he would stay in my arms all day, without saying a word. Sometimes he would tell me about the fallen comrades, as in paying their memory a tribute, and I listened. It seemed to grant him some relief, and him watching him suffer was unbearable.

"Yes...It was… Successful."

Another pause. I just hoped Hannes wouldn't try apologizing for the question – this would make the situation only more awkward than it was. I reverted my gaze to the papers, starting to skim them through although the uneasiness of the moment distracted me a lot, and thus I couldn't understand whatever I was reading.

"You wanted to join the Survey Corps, didn't you? May I ask...What made you change your mind?"

The question of his hit me like a thunder. I did not expect it nor I saw where it came from, but it made my look back up at once. Hannes took a chair and pulled it to himself, taking a seat right in front of me. What was with this sudden confrontation?

"I… I just thought things through, that's it. I realized I'm not well suited for it, that's it. I would be danger to myself and to my comrades."

I could tell he was not convinced. The stare of Hannes was intense and made me uncomfortable, yet he refused to avert it.

"Was it because of Erwin? Did he not let you join?"

I blinked. How could he possibly know it? Not once I hinted to that being the case, it wasn't even openly discussed between ourselves. Erwin only once mentioned he does not want me in Survey Corps, and since then all my efforts to join were futile. I could not help but feel his hand on it, even if Erwin would never confess it.

"This is quite a ridiculous assum-"

"I don't blame him. Back in a day...I was against Claudia joining military at all. Yet, unlike Erwin, I had no power to stop her. I must look like a horrible husband exposing her to danger now, nudging her to put this uniform every day again… I know what you think. But this is not it. I want her to be safe and that's why I urged her to return."

He interrupted me for a monologue, and I understood it was a confession he kept within himself for a long time. The man bowed his head, looking so defeated I couldn't help but feel sorry for him. I reached out to land my hand on his shoulder.

"Hannes. Not for a moment I thought you were a bad person. I'm aware you pushed her to military for her sake, and trust me when I say Claudia knows that much too."

He raised his head and I saw tears shining in his eyes.

"I just...I just don't want her to ever experience what I have. When I first saw a titan… I was so scared I couldn't move, let alone fight it. I allowed my friend to be eaten, I could have saved her had I not been a coward. I live with that guilt ever since, I owe her life to her kid and his friends, and it is difficult to bear. I don't want Claudia to ever experience that… And I think Erwin doesn't want you to ever crumble under weight of those whom you left to die either."

My heart skipped a beat at his words. Hannes had a point – I had no idea how would I react facing a real titan, and yet it wounded me. I was not a frail maiden in distress, my sense of duty was stronger than anything. Sometimes lives had to be sacrificed, I knew that much from Erwin and his crew, yet I believed I was strong enough to cope with it. If he was, I had to as well – Erwin was a strong man, and I wanted to be a strong woman on his side.

"I'm sure this will never happen again, Hannes. And if it does, I'm certain you will be able to protect Claudia from any harm that may come her way. As for your theory regarding Erwin… It is wrong. He has nothing to do with me being here, it was, as I've mentioned, my choice."

Hannes looks both, hurt and relieved. My words did soothe his worries, but he sure sensed dishonesty for the second part, and probably suspected I might be distrusting him. It was not the case, not really...I just did not want to look as if I was babied and protected, even if that was the case.

"Thank you, Delice. I guess I needed to talk to someone. You're always great help."

He gave me a smile and I returned him one as well. We were rather close – professionally close rather than personally. We would not hang out outside work, but at work I knew we had each other's backs and could cry on one another's shoulder had there been a need.

"Anytime, Hannes. If you need to talk, I'm always here."

The older man nodded as he raised off his chair. As he bid me a goodbye and headed to the door, he stopped for a second before taking his leave.

"He is doing it for you. Out of fear of losing you. Don't disregard his efforts."


End file.
